I just finished watching 'Serendipity' on TV, I heard so much about it.. about how good it was but it was kind of a letdown. I found the story so corny. Maybe it's just me but I don't know, I just felt that nothing in life can get that messed up and then still have a happy ending.
Christmas passed very slowly and lonely for me. Kelvin had to work and I was left alone with Sam. Don't get me wrong, Sam's wonderful to be around with but you can't have a conversation with a baby can you? I just need that 'human' contact, that's all.
On a cheerier note, Sam has learnt to stand and he can now take steps (when assisted)! It is fun to see him take his steps every now and then. Too bad I cannot post pictures here, coz I'd have to upgrade and pay $$.... something I don't want to do yet since I'm not blogging that regularly... yet. Maybe later.
Friday, December 26, 2003
Thursday, December 25, 2003
Saturday, December 13, 2003
While having my shower I wondered who’d read my blog. I mean what kind of person reads blogs anyway? Won’t they have better things to do than to read about someone else’s rantings? To be fair, not all blogs are rants. Some are pretty good actually. My guess is a blogger would read other bloggers’ blog. That’s what being a blogger is isn’t it? Writing and reading blogs… errr… right? Anyway, someone from www.flyingchair.net is holding this best blogger awards thingy and if you are free do go over there for a whole list of blog sites to visit. Some are really good, like this photoblog called CY Leow’s photoblog and Screenshots by Jeff Ooi (both Malaysian blogs). Others are ok, and some are plain junk like meesh (from Malaysia) and xiaxue (from Singapore).
Well, that’s my two-cents anyway, go rate them yourselves.
Well, that’s my two-cents anyway, go rate them yourselves.
Friday, December 12, 2003
Sometimes I wonder why I bother but then again where can I ramble and complain without irritating anyone else? Sigh...... guess this is better than bottling it all inside waiting for it to eat me up one day. Anyway, here goes, my mom-in-law called me yesterday afternoon. There was no cordial 'Hello Nat, how have you been doing? We missed you at prayers last week.' (Just FYI, I had classes all weekend and it was a refreshing break from babysitting!).
Instead all I got was her angry voice demanding that I TELL my hubby to return the bottle of 'ginseng' which she accused him of NOT eating. She wanted us to bring it to the family gathering that evening. How does she know that he did not take it?? I wonder.... did we announce it to the world like..."Hey everyone, we have a bottle of 'ginseng' here that we are not taking!!!" No, I'm sure it's just her way of telling me that she's pissed that I did not take her to the flower shop like she TOLD me to.
Yup, she TOLD me to bring her to the flower shop a couple of days before Sammy fell ill (and a day before Kelvin went to HK). As I was not free then, I said I would when I could, then Sammy fell ill and I was kept busy, busy, busy. But I guess since she didn't bother to call to find out how we were doing she didn't know that Sammy was ill or that I had my hands full and could use some help.
Anyway, she was rude to me on the phone. I told Kelvin that his mom wanted her 'ginseng' back and he said that he'll pay her for it since he spoilt it. What surprised me most was how my mom-in-law acted that evening when she saw us. She was cordial to me!! Imagine that, the cunning woman was actually talking nicely to me! I deduced that she was nice only because Kelvin was around and well, if that's her game, then fine. I will be on my toes from now on.
I actually thought we were getting along for awhile! I was trying hard to be a friend to her for Kelvin's sake. I didn't mind ferrying her around when she needed to get some things, even brought her shopping for her household stuff but I guess all that has been in vain. She must have seen me as just an errand girl or something equivalent and is not grateful for the friendship that I have extended her. How very sad.
Instead all I got was her angry voice demanding that I TELL my hubby to return the bottle of 'ginseng' which she accused him of NOT eating. She wanted us to bring it to the family gathering that evening. How does she know that he did not take it?? I wonder.... did we announce it to the world like..."Hey everyone, we have a bottle of 'ginseng' here that we are not taking!!!" No, I'm sure it's just her way of telling me that she's pissed that I did not take her to the flower shop like she TOLD me to.
Yup, she TOLD me to bring her to the flower shop a couple of days before Sammy fell ill (and a day before Kelvin went to HK). As I was not free then, I said I would when I could, then Sammy fell ill and I was kept busy, busy, busy. But I guess since she didn't bother to call to find out how we were doing she didn't know that Sammy was ill or that I had my hands full and could use some help.
Anyway, she was rude to me on the phone. I told Kelvin that his mom wanted her 'ginseng' back and he said that he'll pay her for it since he spoilt it. What surprised me most was how my mom-in-law acted that evening when she saw us. She was cordial to me!! Imagine that, the cunning woman was actually talking nicely to me! I deduced that she was nice only because Kelvin was around and well, if that's her game, then fine. I will be on my toes from now on.
I actually thought we were getting along for awhile! I was trying hard to be a friend to her for Kelvin's sake. I didn't mind ferrying her around when she needed to get some things, even brought her shopping for her household stuff but I guess all that has been in vain. She must have seen me as just an errand girl or something equivalent and is not grateful for the friendship that I have extended her. How very sad.
Got this is the mail today. It's a little long but worth the read.
THE PERFUME
As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same.
However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.
It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.
Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag.
Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long to say, " Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.
On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive.
The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets."
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer... the letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.
The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.
Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.
They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."
Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
THE PERFUME
As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same.
However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.
It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.
Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag.
Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long to say, " Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.
On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive.
The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets."
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer... the letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.
The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.
Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.
They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."
Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
Thursday, December 11, 2003
Wednesday, December 10, 2003
Today as I was patting Sam for his afternoon nap, my thoughts drifted to my mom and aunt who came to visit me last week. I thought of their cheery chit chats and laughter and how I missed them. I thought about how close they are even after spending half their lives apart. I thought of the support my mom and aunt gave each other during their times of need - my mom for her angioplasty and my aunt for the removal of her left breast.
My thoughts then went to my sister. We've lived apart about half our lives too! I left home at 17+ to work in a foreign country whilst my younger sis and brother completed their education. Our family was poor, my mom couldn't afford to put me thru university so I decided to give my younger siblings a chance by going out to work. I didn't earn much, in fact my first official paycheck was only a meagre SGD534.00, earned working as a bank clerk. I have been working ever since.
Anyway, back to my sis, lucky for us we are still close, we call each other every now and then, we email each other almost weekly and we still meet up every year! I'm glad I have her in my life and I want our relationship to be just like that of my mom and aunt's, forever!!
My thoughts then went to my sister. We've lived apart about half our lives too! I left home at 17+ to work in a foreign country whilst my younger sis and brother completed their education. Our family was poor, my mom couldn't afford to put me thru university so I decided to give my younger siblings a chance by going out to work. I didn't earn much, in fact my first official paycheck was only a meagre SGD534.00, earned working as a bank clerk. I have been working ever since.
Anyway, back to my sis, lucky for us we are still close, we call each other every now and then, we email each other almost weekly and we still meet up every year! I'm glad I have her in my life and I want our relationship to be just like that of my mom and aunt's, forever!!
Thursday, December 04, 2003
Sam fell ill last Sunday and is now recovering, thank God for that. I was so worried that his fever was never going to break! It finally did. The doc said that it was most likely a viral infection, hard to comprehend that when I hardly bring him out at all.
Anyway, the past 3 sleepless nights have taken its toll on me, I now have a splitting headache that doesn't seem to want to go away and my patience is really short. Yes, I am a monster when I'm tired, I'll admit that, but who isn't right? Looking after an ill baby is really tough, Sam was crying and fretting a lot, so much so that at times I felt like smacking him. Don't worry, that's normal, what is not normal would be for me to actually do it!
My new semester starts tomorrow! Don't know if I'll attend the first lesson of the semester as Sam is still not perfectly well yet. We'll see how it is tomorrow. I can't believe that I am already half way through my degree course, really looking forward to completing it soon. It's really taxing to have a baby and study part time!
Here's something I got in the mail yesterday, enjoy.
TO ALL THE INCREDIBLE WOMEN THAT GOD CREATED.
By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart and have two pairs of hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Two pairs of hands! No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
"But I can't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?" asked the angel.
The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
AND SHE IS!
Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without, so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friends dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can help to heal a broken heart.
Women come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. They'll drive, fly, walk, run.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning!
They bring joy and hope. They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
If there's one flaw in women, it is that they tend to forget about themselves.
Anyway, the past 3 sleepless nights have taken its toll on me, I now have a splitting headache that doesn't seem to want to go away and my patience is really short. Yes, I am a monster when I'm tired, I'll admit that, but who isn't right? Looking after an ill baby is really tough, Sam was crying and fretting a lot, so much so that at times I felt like smacking him. Don't worry, that's normal, what is not normal would be for me to actually do it!
My new semester starts tomorrow! Don't know if I'll attend the first lesson of the semester as Sam is still not perfectly well yet. We'll see how it is tomorrow. I can't believe that I am already half way through my degree course, really looking forward to completing it soon. It's really taxing to have a baby and study part time!
Here's something I got in the mail yesterday, enjoy.
TO ALL THE INCREDIBLE WOMEN THAT GOD CREATED.
By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart and have two pairs of hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Two pairs of hands! No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
"But I can't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?" asked the angel.
The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
AND SHE IS!
Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without, so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friends dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can help to heal a broken heart.
Women come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. They'll drive, fly, walk, run.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning!
They bring joy and hope. They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
If there's one flaw in women, it is that they tend to forget about themselves.
Tuesday, December 02, 2003
Have I ever mentioned my mom-in-law? I don't think so. My husband was away in Hong Kong for some training his company sent him. He was gone for all of 5 days. In the 5 days that he was gone, my m-i-l didn't call to check if I needed help or if I was ok. The fact that I'm a first-time mom taking care of her grandson who will be carrying the family name (which is a very big deal in Chinese culture and traditions) didn't seem to have any effect on her at all.
No, it's not that I want the attention, but it would have been a nice gesture to find out how I was coping alone at home with a baby..., after all I am the mother of her grandson.
Well, I guess that's her...... being herself. When I married Kelvin, I married his whole family - that's how it is here in Asia. The new family that I got "married" to was not so warm nor caring towards each other... I mean they do try and I'm sure that they love each other very much but they just don't seem to know how to be civil to each other for very long. Gatherings usually end up in arguements, and over the 'silliest' reasons too!
I always wondered why they acted the way they did and slowly I found out that they were just brought up that way..... by the matriach, my m-i-l. Anyway, to make a long story short, she wasn't modelled after the 'Stepford wives'. She's more of a "I'm always right and you're not" person. She tried dominating our marriage but thankfully I managed to reason with Kelvin that it is OUR marriage after all and not hers. Our relationship wasn't actually wonderful in the beginning but I tried to be civil for Kelvin's sake. Didn't want to put him in a difficult spot. Sometimes I wonder why I try so hard........
No, it's not that I want the attention, but it would have been a nice gesture to find out how I was coping alone at home with a baby..., after all I am the mother of her grandson.
Well, I guess that's her...... being herself. When I married Kelvin, I married his whole family - that's how it is here in Asia. The new family that I got "married" to was not so warm nor caring towards each other... I mean they do try and I'm sure that they love each other very much but they just don't seem to know how to be civil to each other for very long. Gatherings usually end up in arguements, and over the 'silliest' reasons too!
I always wondered why they acted the way they did and slowly I found out that they were just brought up that way..... by the matriach, my m-i-l. Anyway, to make a long story short, she wasn't modelled after the 'Stepford wives'. She's more of a "I'm always right and you're not" person. She tried dominating our marriage but thankfully I managed to reason with Kelvin that it is OUR marriage after all and not hers. Our relationship wasn't actually wonderful in the beginning but I tried to be civil for Kelvin's sake. Didn't want to put him in a difficult spot. Sometimes I wonder why I try so hard........
Thursday, November 27, 2003
Yesterday I saw a parent smacked her kid who was throwing a tantrum. Later the same day, I heard a child screaming her (his? can't tell, the voice was too shrill too differentiate) head off! I wonder if we are bringing up our kids right these days. Some children are given so much choice that they become spoilt and demand more. Today, my brother-in-law sent me this story of 'non-violence in parenting' and I thought I'd share it with you...
Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K.Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his June 9 lecture at the University of Puerto Rico, shared the following story as an example of ‘non-violence in parenting’:
"I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. We were deep in the country and had no neighbors, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies. One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father asked me to take care of several pending chores such as getting the car serviced. When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, 'I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together.'
After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theatre. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30pm before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00pm. He anxiously asked me, 'Why were you late?' I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, 'The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait,' not realizing that he had already called the garage.
When he caught me in the lie, he said 'There's something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn't give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it.' So, dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads. I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again. I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all.
I don't think so. I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday. That is the power of non-violence.".
I just hope that I'll be a good parent and pray that God will give me guidance, strength and patience when I need them most.
Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K.Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his June 9 lecture at the University of Puerto Rico, shared the following story as an example of ‘non-violence in parenting’:
"I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. We were deep in the country and had no neighbors, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies. One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father asked me to take care of several pending chores such as getting the car serviced. When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, 'I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together.'
After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theatre. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30pm before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00pm. He anxiously asked me, 'Why were you late?' I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, 'The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait,' not realizing that he had already called the garage.
When he caught me in the lie, he said 'There's something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn't give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it.' So, dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads. I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again. I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all.
I don't think so. I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday. That is the power of non-violence.".
I just hope that I'll be a good parent and pray that God will give me guidance, strength and patience when I need them most.
Sunday, November 23, 2003
My exams are over.. at last but only for this semester. I have 3 more semesters to go and then it will finally be over!! I cannot wait. It seems like a dream, 3 more semesters.
I'm going to be the fist one in my family to have a degree and I'm feeling pretty good about it :) I've been studying part time for very long, almost for as long as I can remember. Started with my certificate course, then my diploma and the advanced diploma and finally, this degree course. Yes, I have come a long way and it has taken a very long time for me. I would have completed it sooner, but it does cost a lot to study part time and not having enough funds does put a dampener on one's plans. Enough said, what's important is that I'm finally on my way to completion. Yahoo.......
I'm going to be the fist one in my family to have a degree and I'm feeling pretty good about it :) I've been studying part time for very long, almost for as long as I can remember. Started with my certificate course, then my diploma and the advanced diploma and finally, this degree course. Yes, I have come a long way and it has taken a very long time for me. I would have completed it sooner, but it does cost a lot to study part time and not having enough funds does put a dampener on one's plans. Enough said, what's important is that I'm finally on my way to completion. Yahoo.......
Another joke for today.
For those who are working, you'll find that this sounds pretty familiar......
A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west
longitude."
"You must be an engineer" said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."
The woman below responded, "You must be in management." "I am" replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect people below you to resolve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault.
For those who are working, you'll find that this sounds pretty familiar......
A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west
longitude."
"You must be an engineer" said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."
The woman below responded, "You must be in management." "I am" replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect people below you to resolve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault.
Monday, November 10, 2003
I'm supposed to be studying now... got an exam paper tomorrow and the day after.... but I just can't do it anymore!!!! Can't seem to sit myself down and absorb anymore... for now I hope. Maybe I'll try again after this or... after lunch.
Well, here's another joke I received, hope it cheers someone up... anyone.
A Chinese man walks into a bar in America late one night and he sees Steven
Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and
asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You
Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here." The astonished
Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour,
it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese man gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the
Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies,
"It was the iceberg that sank the ship,not me."
The Chinese man, replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the
same."
Well, here's another joke I received, hope it cheers someone up... anyone.
A Chinese man walks into a bar in America late one night and he sees Steven
Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and
asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You
Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here." The astonished
Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour,
it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese man gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the
Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies,
"It was the iceberg that sank the ship,not me."
The Chinese man, replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the
same."
Tuesday, November 04, 2003
Got this really funny joke today, thought I'd share it. Enjoy:
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year,and
so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my
friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one
thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty
years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would
regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view
of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she
was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the
wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to
me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires
for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got
married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and
couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom and
if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was
stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them
down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and
went straight to the front door.
I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight
towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With
tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you
have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our
daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: always keep your condoms in your car.
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year,and
so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my
friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one
thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty
years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would
regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view
of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she
was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the
wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to
me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires
for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got
married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and
couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom and
if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was
stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them
down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and
went straight to the front door.
I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight
towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With
tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you
have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our
daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: always keep your condoms in your car.
It's been hectic, these past few months... Study, baby and household chores. My life seems to be focused on everything else but me....
It's Samuel's first birthday today, it was supposed to be a happy day but it turned out pretty tiring for me. He decided that today would be tantrum day and drove me up the wall pretty much the whole day. I was on the verge of smacking him for most part of the night, it was a scary thought but I guessed it was a normal thought too, you would have thought the same if you were in my shoes. I managed to control myself, kept on reminding myself that he's still a baby....
Well, at least the nightmare's over, he looks like an angel now asleep in his cot. Tomorrow's a new day...
It's Samuel's first birthday today, it was supposed to be a happy day but it turned out pretty tiring for me. He decided that today would be tantrum day and drove me up the wall pretty much the whole day. I was on the verge of smacking him for most part of the night, it was a scary thought but I guessed it was a normal thought too, you would have thought the same if you were in my shoes. I managed to control myself, kept on reminding myself that he's still a baby....
Well, at least the nightmare's over, he looks like an angel now asleep in his cot. Tomorrow's a new day...
Sunday, June 22, 2003
Another post, I cannot believe that I'm doing this again, so soon after all these months of not blogging. I'm just very stressed, must be because of the exam on Tuesday. I've been squeezing in revision hours throughout the whole of today and am rather tired now. But the studying must go on into the night as that is the only best time for me to get some revision done. It's not easy being a full time mom and a part time student, not easy at all...
Friday, June 20, 2003
Taking care of Sammy for the last six months has its ups and downs, and mostly it has been wonderful. I appreciated more the miracle of God's works when I see the fragile little baby that He gave us grow to the cheeky little baby that Sammy has turned out to be. It is not easy to look after a baby full time and sometimes you can just 'loose it' under all the stress - its worse than being at work!! So I'm really thankful for the strength and perseverance that God has granted me when I needed them most.
Thursday, June 19, 2003
I haven't had time to blog since Samuel was born. It has been a roller coaster ride looking after him and studying part time. Being a first time mom I had to pick up everything from my mom very quickly -it was a make or break situation- coz she was with me only for the first month of my confinement. I watched and practised changing diapers and bathing Sammy under the watchful eyes of my mom. It was tough but she encouraged me all the way, we had differing views though about some stuff, she being 'old fashioned' and all and me wanting to try out what I've read in Dr Miriam Stoppard's 'Complete Baby & Childcare'. The arguements that I had with my mom on how certain things should be done meant that someone was around with me and (more importantly) for me, but best of all was that someone was around to comfort me and look after me during my first month after childbirth.
The old Chinese folks believe that if one does not take care of herself during this period (called the 'confinement period') and recuperate 'properly', she will be 'weak' physically from then on. Confinement period here meant a whole lot of dos and don'ts -some of them being a) no bathes for a whole month b) no going out of the house c) try not to reveal any body parts (limbs included!) to the wind!! d) no air-con and the list goes on and on....
I can't say that I had a good confinement, Sammy was diagnosed to have 'G6PD Deficiency' and he was also jaundiced on the day that we were supposed to check-out of the hospital. The doctors wanted to keep him in the Neo-natal ward for observation for two weeks! I was heartbroken, Sammy had not left my side since he was born and now I was to be separated from him for two weeks, I cried - a lot. Since I was breastfeeding him I had to go back to the hospital everyday. So much for the much needed rest that I was supposed to get and all the other dos and don'ts. I was really exhausted after a week of shuttling to and from the hospital and decided to get the doctors to release him, they agreed but only if I would sign an indemnity form, typical!
Sammy came home on day 10 of his life, I was exhilarated!
The old Chinese folks believe that if one does not take care of herself during this period (called the 'confinement period') and recuperate 'properly', she will be 'weak' physically from then on. Confinement period here meant a whole lot of dos and don'ts -some of them being a) no bathes for a whole month b) no going out of the house c) try not to reveal any body parts (limbs included!) to the wind!! d) no air-con and the list goes on and on....
I can't say that I had a good confinement, Sammy was diagnosed to have 'G6PD Deficiency' and he was also jaundiced on the day that we were supposed to check-out of the hospital. The doctors wanted to keep him in the Neo-natal ward for observation for two weeks! I was heartbroken, Sammy had not left my side since he was born and now I was to be separated from him for two weeks, I cried - a lot. Since I was breastfeeding him I had to go back to the hospital everyday. So much for the much needed rest that I was supposed to get and all the other dos and don'ts. I was really exhausted after a week of shuttling to and from the hospital and decided to get the doctors to release him, they agreed but only if I would sign an indemnity form, typical!
Sammy came home on day 10 of his life, I was exhilarated!
Wednesday, February 26, 2003
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